THE WEST WING
7x15 - “WELCOME TO WHEREVER YOU ARE”
WRITTEN BY JOSH SINGER
DIRECTED BY MATIA KARRELL
Transcribed by Walking, Talking, And Yelling At Clouds
(kegofglory.blogspot.com)
Link To My Blog Post For This Episode
TEASER
WELCOME TO WHEREVER YOU ARE
FADE IN: AIRPORT TARMAC – NIGHT
LAMBERT – ST. LOUIS INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT
A motorcade rulls up to a waiting aircraft, air stairs at the ready. We hear someone humming. As the motorcade stops and people begin to exit the vehicles, we see one of them is ANNABETH, singing the Stevie Wonder song For Once In My Life.
3:00 AM
THURSDAY, OCTOBER 31ST
5 DAYS UNTIL THE ELECTION
ANNABETH (singing)
For once in my life, I’ve found someone who needs me
Someone I’ve needed so long -
MATT, HELEN, and DONNA join ANNABETH as they walk towards the plane.
HELEN
Now that was a rally!
DONNA
Thirty thousand people.
MATT
And one hell of an opening act.
ANNABETH (continuing to sing)
= I will go where life leads me -
MATT
You know he was 17 when he recorded that?
HELEN
It’s kinda hot.
MATT
You, uh, partial to young achievers?
HELEN
Yeah. Musicians, really.
MATT
Oh.
ANNABETH (still singing)
- where my hearrrt only dreammmmed oooof -
DONNA
Okay, easy there, Stevie.
HELEN
Hey, if you can’t boogie to the man -
DONNA
I think she’s singing about Leo.
HELEN looks at DONNA in surprise.
MATT (gesturing to the sky)
Chicago, we hardly knew ye.
HELEN (grabbing his hands)
We’re in St. Louis.
MATT
Really?
HELEN
Uh-huh.
MATT
We should, uh, hit the town, try some of that fresh frozen … custard.
DONNA
We have an early rally in Scranton, sir.
MATT
That’s not even an option?
DONNA
‘Fraid not.
HELEN
Is sleep an option?
MATT
Sleep is for the weak!
HELEN
Oh, you’ve had six hours in the last three days, you’re starting to talk funny.
MATT
We’ve added some jokes to the stump.
HELEN
Oh!
DONNA (as they head up the air stairs)
We’ll get him to sleep just as soon as we go over the five-day schedule.
CUT TO: INT. - SANTOS CAMPAIGN PLANE – NIGHT
JOSH and LOUISE are looking over a whiteboard map of the United States, with arrows and lines of different colors zigzagging across the country.
LOUISE
Man, it’s ugly.
JOSH
Very.
LOUISE
Four states and six markets a day.
JOSH
Killer, huh?
LOUISE
You sound excited about this.
JOSH
I’m just saying, Everest is for sissies.
LOUISE
You’re a masochist.
HELEN and DONNA appear behind JOSH and LOUISE.
DONNA
This is news?
JOSH
Hey, I heard he did well.
HELEN
Almost as well as Mr. Wonder.
DONNA
Speaking of which, where’s Annabeth?
LOUISE
I gagged her and threw her in a luggage compartment.
JOSH
Uh, she’s checking in with Leo.
HELEN (under her breath)
Apparently.
JOSH
Excuse me?
HELEN
Nothing.
LOUISE
Really?
JOSH
What?
LOUISE
Nothing.
DONNA
You don’t wanna know.
MATT (entering)
Know what?
HELEN
Uhhh, let’s take a look at the schedule.
DONNA
Good idea. Lou?
LOUISE (pointing at a chart on the whiteboard)
Okay, across the top, days of the week, down the side, major battleground states. Blue S’s for Santos, green L’s for Leo, red B’s for Bartlet – the purple clovers are to entertain me when I’m waiting for Josh to make up his mind.
DONNA
Nice touch.
LOUISE
Thank you.
HELEN (peering at the whiteboard)
So, tomorrow we are in Scranton, Bethlehem, Philadelphia, Cincinnati, Dayton and Houston?
JOSH
Last five days, it’s all about hustle.
HELEN
We really need another stop in Houston?
JOSH
It’s a turnout game, so yes, plus it’s a bridge to Friday when we cover Texas, then on to L.A. and Leno.
ANNABETH (entering)
Leo thinks we need to add a stop in Florida.
LOUISE
Hello, sunshine.
HELEN
He wants to add a stop?
ANNABETH
Zogby’s got us down by two, and we’re not there till Saturday.
JOSH
Congressman?
MATT (who has been sitting rubbing his eyes since he sat down)
Yeah.
JOSH
Sir?
MATT
Okay. (sitting up) I could use some coffee.
HELEN
No more coffee for you.
MATT
It helps with the narcolepsy.
HELEN
Doesn’t help with the sleeping.
JOSH
We’re considering adding a stop in Florida tomorrow. We’re down by two. The whole state is dark until Saturday.
MATT
Well, sure, I mean, if you think -
HELEN
I will do it.
MATT
No, honey, you don’t have to do it -
HELEN
No, I will do it.
ANNABETH
Actually, Zoey Bartlet will be doing some women’s events outside Miami tomorrow, if Mrs. Santos could join her -
JOSH
Great, okay, so, you, you’ll have her back for the trick-or-treating, photo op in, Dayton?
ANNABETH
No problem.
JOSH
Okay, good – (MATT and HELEN exchange a kiss) So, tomorrow, Pennsylvania, Ohio, Texas – Friday, Texas, then California, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, we hit the big five.
LOUISE
Big five, Pennsylvania, Ohio, Florida, Texas, and California.
MATT
Five states a day?
LOUISE
Yes, we’re gonna play time-zone hopscotch, we fly with the sun.
JOSH
California’s screwing up our sleep cycle.
HELEN
What sleep cycle?
JOSH
Congressman?
MATT
Five days, huh? (beat) Hey, you can hang by your thumbs for five days.
JOSH
There you have it, folks. Signed, sealed, and delivered, the last five days of the Santos campaign.
SMASH CUT TO: MAIN TITLES.
END TEASER.
***
ACT ONE
FADE IN: INT. - INDUSTRIAL BUILDING – DAY
MATT is talking with reporters in what looks like an open warehouse area. JOSH comes walking in from outside. He is talking with TOBY on his cell phone.
9:30 AM
THURSDAY, OCTOBER 31ST
SCRANTON, PA
REPORTER 1
Do you feel like you’ve been getting your message across?
JOSH (into phone)
Hey, did you see the Illinois numbers?
MATT
Well, I think people here should just know that we had -
TOBY (VO, on phone)
You should do the crossword.
JOSH (into phone)
We’re up three points.
TOBY (VO, on phone)
People who regularly do the crossword are less likely to experience mental decline.
JOSH (into phone)
I enjoy these calls, I really do.
We CUT to a quick shot of TOBY on his phone.
TOBY (into phone)
Miami-Dade, you need to pay attention -
Back to Scranton.
JOSH (into phone, as LOUISE runs up)
Hang on -
LOUISE
HQ just emailed the latest ads.
JOSH
We got Vinick’s -
LOUISE
Every ad he’s run all week.
JOSH (to LOUISE)
I wanna screen ‘em right away.
LOUISE
Have you checked out the Pennsylvania numbers?
JOSH (into phone)
Yep, Pennsylvania, Illinois, California -
Back to TOBY. He is nicely dressed, and appears to be sitting in a fancy office meeting room.
TOBY (into phone)
Miami-Dade voter registration.
Back to Scranton.
JOSH (into phone)
You’re a killjoy, you know that? You’re a doorstep-darkener, you darken doorsteps.
TOBY (VO, on phone)
Yeah. You need to look into -
JOSH (into phone, as OTTO brings him a report)
Hold, please.
OTTO
Vinick’s remarks in Ohio and Texas, Sullivan’s remarks in Virginia.
We see TOBY listening as JOSH talks to OTTO.
JOSH (VO, on phone)
You got the -
OTTO (VO, on phone)
Yeah.
JOSH (VO, on phone)
Good, and the … the rundown on the …
Back to Scranton.
JOSH
Thanks. (into phone, as he looks at a stack of papers) Sorry, go ahead.
TOBY (VO, on phone)
Miami-Dade. You’re down two in Florida!
JOSH (as he mixes with the reporters and other attendees talking to MATT)
It’s pretty loud – it’s kinda hard to hear.
TOBY (VO, on phone, shouting)
You’re down two in Florida, Josh!
JOSH (into phone)
I’m on it! For the love of God -
REPORTER (to MATT)
How many states are you hitting today?
MATT
Uh, I think Josh Lyman over there is shooting for about 50.
The reporters chuckle. JOSH turns away and talks into his phone.
MATT
Yeah, we’re gonna try and hit as many states as we can.
JOSH (into phone)
You got, uh – another meeting today?
Back to TOBY.
TOBY (into phone)
Yeah.
Back to JOSH.
JOSH (into phone)
Let’s make a deal?
Back to TOBY.
TOBY (into phone)
Or not.
JOSH (VO, on phone)
Let me know how it goes.
TOBY (beat, then into phone)
Yeah, thanks.
Back to Scranton, where JOSH hangs up and signals to DONNA, who is standing next to MATT.
DONNA
Okay, one more.
REPORTER
Who do you like in the game this weekend?
MATT
Uhh, Philly and New York, both strong teams. Uh, should be a great game.
REPORTER
Thanks, Congressman.
DONNA
Thanks, guys!
CUT TO: INT. - SANTOS CAMPAIGN BUS – DAY
DONNA and MATT step onto the bus, where there are donors and party bigwigs waiting.
MATT
We are in, uh, Pennsylvania, aren’t we?
DONNA
Yeah. (introducing a man in the aisle) Harris Malbin, Pennsylvania party chair.
MATT (shaking hands)
Harris.
JOSH (from the back of the bus as a photographer gets a picture of MATT and Malbin)
You’ve got Wallace from headquarters on turnout, Goodwin on legal contingencies, CIA briefer, former NSA Nancy McNally on Kazakhstan. How you doin’?
MATT (grabbing coffee)
Lot of people out there for an 8:00 am rally.
JOSH
Let’s try that again. How are you doing?
MATT
I’m okay, except for the thermometer stuck up my -
JOSH
Okay -
JON BON JOVI appears in the bus.
BON JOVI
Congressman, I’m just checking in -
MATT (setting down his coffee and shaking hands)
Oh! Jon! Good to see you.
BON JOVI
My pleasure, sir.
MATT
Lou mentioned all the great work you’ve been doing with Habitat. It’s really a privilege to have you here with us today.
BON JOVI
Well, thank you, sir, it’s a privilege to play for the next President of the United States.
CUT TO: EXTERIOR SHOT – FEDERAL BUILDING
U.S. ATTORNEY’S OFFICE
DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA
CUT TO: INT. - MEETING ROOM – DAY
TOBY is sitting in a chair at the table, working on a crossword. A man brings in a tray of glasses and water and sets them on the table. As he exits, TOBY’s attorney, ALANA WATERMAN, enters.
ALANA (as she sits next to TOBY)
Hello, Toby. (he doesn’t answer) Toby?
TOBY
Yeah?
ALANA
We really need to prep before the -
TOBY
What’s a five-letter word for blowhard?
ALANA
Toby -
TOBY
That’s four letters, counselor.
ALANA
We really need to prep before the US Attorney gets here.
TOBY
Yes, yes, no, and I already knew.
ALANA
Excuse me?
TOBY
You wanted to prep, those are the answers. I know that, because he’s asked me the same question five or six times now.
ALANA
Okay, there’s a reason that the US -
TOBY
Really, I should just make a tape.
ALANA
There’s a reason the US Attorney keeps asking us down here.
There is a knock at the door and a couple of the US Attorney’s assistants enter.
MAN
Counselor.
ALANA
Morning.
WOMAN
Morning, counselor.
ALANA
Morning.
CUT TO: INT. - SANTOS CAMPAIGN BUS – DAY
JOSH is on the phone, LOUISE is laying on a couch watching Vinick ads on her laptop, a new staffer, TEDDY, is sitting behind JOSH. It’s a cacophony of noise.
JOSH (into phone)
No, I already got Vinick’s schedule, I need Sullivan’s.
TV AD VOICEOVER (on LOUISE’s laptop)
Arnold Vinick is seasoned in the art of wisdom, he has had a hand in every foreign policy decision -
LOUISE
A hearing aid and a pair of bifocals.
MATT (walking from the back of the bus, on his phone)
And anything that we can get on the status of the troops in Astana, okay? Thanks. (he hangs up, then greets a new staffer who stands up next to JOSH, who is still talking on his phone) Hey, Teddy.
TEDDY (shaking hands)
Hey.
MATT (as they sit)
Welcome to the circus.
TEDDY
Thank you, sir.
MATT
Did you get to meet, uh, Bon Jovi?
LOUISE
Bon Jovi’s here?
JOSH
Hey – Stevie Wonder opened for us last night.
LOUISE
Old Jersey girl, Joshua – Camaros, muscle Ts, a little Slippery When Wet.
JOSH
That is an album title, right?
MATT
Guys, can we, uh - ?
JOSH
Yeah. Teddy, go ahead.
TEDDY
Um, sir, I wanted to take you through the, um, election day turnout operation.
LOUISE
I don’t believe it!
JOSH
What?
LOUISE (gesturing at her laptop)
They stole our slogan!
TV AD VOICEOVER (on LOUISE’s laptop)
Yes, America can.
OTTO (as he steps onto the bus)
Isn’t that our slogan?
LOUISE
Damn right it is.
MATT (trying to get back on track)
Teddy - ?
OTTO (to LOUISE)
You all right?
LOUISE
No.
JOSH
Her, uh, back went out.
LOUISE
Get me Donna.
OTTO (shouting)
Donna!
JOSH
Okay, now I have seven copies of Vinick’s schedule -
MATT (to TEDDY)
You should just keep talking -
JOSH
Can I get Sullivan’s schedule?
TEDDY (laughing)
Okay, okay, um …
MATT
Election turnout.
TEDDY
Right, well, we have, um, 10,000 volunteers in just the major battleground cities -
LOUISE
Hey, I need to make copies of the first Vinick ad -
TEDDY
- plus an additional, um, five thousand in New York -
DONNA (handing papers to JOSH)
The latest polls from AP and Reuters.
JOSH
Hey, thank you …
TEDDY
- and an additional five thousand in New York, Boston, and, uh -
JOSH
Hey, hold on – I need the polling detail for -
MATT (to TEDDY)
Teddy?
DONNA
Otto!
MATT (to TEDDY
Are we concerned about the inner city?
TEDDY
We’re, we’re fine.
JOSH (to TEDDY)
Talk about the Latino turnout.
TEDDY
We are a little concerned about the Latino turnout.
JOSH
Yeah. (to OTTO) I need the Colorado polling detail. (to MATT) Miami-Dade registration numbers are only up two percent in the last four years.
MATT
Miami-Dade’s 60 percent Latino.
LOUISE
Sixty-two.
MATT
Thank you. So do you think Miami is indictative -
JOSH
Latino turnout across the country, yes, we do.
TEDDY
Yes, sir, and given how crucial Latino turnout is -
MATT (rubbing his head)
Yeah, I, I, I got it, I got it. So – what are we gonna do? You know, to remind everyone that I’m Latino?
TEDDY hands a paper to MATT.
MATT
Ah, ineligible ex-cons in Florida.
LOUISE
Did you see my phone?
JOSH
It’s in your -
LOUISE raises her hand and sees she’s holding her phone.
MATT
A lot of states deny ex-cons the right to vote -
OTTO hustles up the steps into the bus, then trips and falls, papers flying everywhere.
OTTO
Oh, I’m sorry -
JOSH
Okay – maybe that’s why we don’t run on the bus.
TEDDY
Uh, sir, we don’t wanna push ex-con voting, but a lot of these guys have already cleared parole. Under Florida state law, they should be -
DONNA
This is a mess.
LOUISE
That’s helpful.
DONNA
You know, he’s got the Times-Tribune call.
JOSH
Yeah.
MATT
Do we think the governor’s stacking the list?
TEDDY
Well, the suggestion he’s trying to, um, keep Latinos away from the polls -
MATT
Would set the fire under the ass of every culicha south of Jacksonville, sure, but that’s a hell of an accusation for me to be throwing out there five days out.
JOSH
Not you.
LOUISE
See these Colorado numbers?
JOSH
Yeah, that’s why I asked Otto for the detail.
TEDDY
Sir, there’s a MANA rally in Miami at noon.
MATT
You wanna send Helen out there?
JOSH
She just has to mention it.
OTTO
You know he’s late for the Times-Tribune thing.
JOSH, LOUISE, and OTHERS
We know!
MATT
Why can’t we get Ruiz or Hinajosa to, uh, give that speech?
TEDDY
Si-, sir, if we’re gonna do this, we’ve gotta do it with a bang.
MATT
My blonde wife lecturing the National Organization of Latinas. Yeah, that’s a bang.
JOSH
We can’t get the media trucks out there if we don’t have a headliner.
MATT (standing, heading for the back)
Okay, thanks, Teddy. Give me, uh, a couple of seconds.
CUT TO: INT. - MEETING ROOM – DAY
TOBY is still working on the crossword, ALANA sitting next to him. The door opens and US Attorney PETER BLAKE enters.
BLAKE
Ms. Waterman, Mr. Ziegler.
ALANA
Mr. Blake.
BLAKE
Sorry to keep you waiting. (sitting) Mr. Ziegler, I invited you down here today to -
TOBY
You have a five-letter word for blowhard?
ALANA
Toby -
TOBY
Just asking.
BLAKE
Mr. Ziegler. As much as we both enjoy these sessions, I was hoping we could keep this one brief.
ALANA and TOBY both nod.
BLAKE
Thank you. Now, there’s a deal on the table, and as much as I wouldn’t mind locking you up for the next six years, the information you leaked was classified, you were not authorized to have it, and the public – a group you should have some allegiance to - has the right to know where you got it. You broke the law, you didn’t do it alone – tell me where you got your information, we knock it down to a year.
TOBY
With time off for good behavior. (beat) I appreciate your trying to keep it brief, I’ll keep it briefer, I’m not interested.
BLAKE
Didn’t think you would be.
TOBY
First five times I said no tip you off?
BLAKE (scoffs)
They did, in fact, which is why I’m adding a sweetener.
BLAKE slides a file over to ALANA.
TOBY
What is it?
ALANA
It’s a second indictment.
TOBY
For what?
BLAKE
Obstruction of justice. Mr. Ziegler tells me where he got his information or I call the grand jury and have him indicted for obstruction of justice. Tomorrow.
TOBY (chuckling)
You’re adding another indictment four days before a Presidential election?
BLAKE
Not only will I indict you again … but I’m going to subpeona CJ Cregg, Leo McGarry, and President Bartlet.
ALANA
It’ll look like a coverup, like he’s covering up for someone in the White House.
BLAKE
He hasn’t given me any reason to believe he’s not.
TOBY
You’re gonna sabotage a national election over this?
BLAKE
No. You are.
BLAKE stands and starts out, then stops.
BLAKE
Oh, and, uh, by the way, it’s ‘storm.’
TOBY
Excuse me?
BLAKE
Five letters for ‘blow hard’? Storm. Pretty sure that’s the word you’re looking for.
BLAKE walks out, followed by his assistants.
FADE OUT.
END ACT ONE.
* * *
ACT TWO
FADE IN: EXT. - PARKING AREA – DAY
MATT is talking with reporters as DONNA walks away, talking into a cell phone.
12:00 PM
BETHLEHEM, PA
REPORTER 1
What will you focus on in your first hundred days?
MATT
Well, first 100 days, we’ve been, uh, tossing around a lot of ideas, we’re just starting to nail it down …
MATT’s voice fades in the background as we focus on DONNA.
DONNA (into phone)
Uh-huh. (beat) Y-, yeah, su, sure, but -
DONNA is now standing next to LOUISE under a refreshment tent, also talking into a cell phone.
LOUISE (into phone)
It’s our slogan!
DONNA (into phone, cont.)
Yes, but, but, well, tights?
LOUISE (into phone)
We used it two months ago!
DONNA (into phone)
It’s not exactly presidential.
LOUISE (into phone)
I don’t care if it’s a coincidence.
DONNA (into phone)
Okay, I’ll see what I can do.
LOUISE (into phone)
Oh, come on, there’s a story here. (as DONNA hangs up) Hello? Hello? (she hangs up)
DONNA (getting herself some coffee)
Hey, how you feeling?
LOUISE
Terrible, they just hung up on me.
DONNA
AP?
LOUISE
Reuters.
DONNA
Snotty.
LOUISE
Little bit. How’s it going with the Times?
DONNA
I just got off the phone with Stu from The Tonight Show.
LOUISE
Comedy writer?
DONNA
He thinks so. Incidentally, you don’t think the Congressman would want to wear tights on national TV, do you?
LOUISE
Tights.
DONNA
They want him to dress like Robin Hood for a sketch.
LOUISE
Why not Zorro?
DONNA
I’ll call the Times.
DONNA
Let me know if they bite. (cagily) Have you seen Jon?
DONNA
Jon?
LOUISE
Bon Jovi. Sixty thousand people in Bethlehem and the Congressman just wanted to say thank you.
DONNA
I think I saw him in the, press van.
DONNA walks away as LOUISE gets on her phone and starts for the press van.
LOUISE
Jack, it’s Lou. Got a story for you.
CUT TO: OUTSIDE THE SANTOS CAMPAIGN BUS
MATT is still taking reporters’ questions.
REPORTER 2
And how do you think you’re doing?
MATT
I think the people who are listening know that we have fresh ideas and a new approach.
DONNA (walking up to stand behind MATT)
One more question.
REPORTER 2
Do you plan on watching the game this weekend?
MATT
Uh, Philly and New York, they’re both strong teams, I’m looking forward to it.
REPORTER 2
Thank you, Congressman.
MATT
Thank you, all.
MATT and the reporters exchange ‘thank yous’ as he gets on the bus.
MATT (to DONNA, as he steps onboard the bus)
You have my wife?
DONNA
She’s on the phone with Josh. (referring to someone in the aisle) Congresswoman Leah Stein.
MATT steps down the aisle, greeting STEIN, shaking hands and posing for a photo.
MATT
Leah – how are you?
MATT then turns and shakes hands with BARRY GOODWIN, also in the aisle. We can see JOSH in the back of the bus, a cell phone to his ear.
MATT
Barry, thanks so much for coming. If you could just give me a minute -
GOODWIN
No problem, Congressman.
MATT
Thank you.
MATT continues to the back of the bus, and we hear JOSH on the phone with HELEN.
JOSH (into phone)
Yeah. Yeah, of course, ma’am, would y-, actually, he’s, he’s right here. (handing the phone to MATT) She’s, pretty riled up.
MATT
Wonder why. (into phone) Hey.
HELEN (VO, on phone)
The National Organization of Latinas?
MATT (hand over the phone, to JOSH)
You got those numbers for me?
JOSH
Yes, I do.
HELEN (VO, on phone)
He does remember I’m white?
We cut to HELEN, nattily dressed, walking through a convention dining room with several other women moving about.
MATT (VO, on phone)
He does now.
HELEN (into phone)
Whiter than white. White Album white.
MATT (VO, on phone)
Believe me, this wasn’t -
HELEN (into phone)
White Devil, (VO, on phone, as we cut to MATT looking at a binder and JOSH and OTTO murmuring in the background) White Dahlia, the White, White Witch – (back to the convention room, into phone, as she walks with ANNABETH) – who lured a big, gorgeous Latino man away from -
MATT (into phone)
Well, honey, you know, if you’re not comfortable doing this -
HELEN (VO, on phone)
No, I’ll go, but I’m not gonna give a speech.
Back to the convention hallway.
HELEN (into phone, cont.)
I’ll do the intro, let Hinajosa talk about the ex-convict lists.
MATT (into phone)
Okay. (to JOSH) Zogby’s got us down by four in Colorado?
JOSH
Yeah.
HELEN (into phone)
And only because it’s a good cause.
MATT (into phone)
You know, on behalf of big, gorgeous Latino men everywhere -
HELEN (VO, on phone)
I’m talking about the five million ex-convicts (back to the hallway, into phone) who can’t vote in this country.
MATT (VO, on phone)
Right.
HELEN (into phone)
My mother’s flying the kids up at 4:00 – (VO, on phone) – make sure they don’t eat too much Halloween candy before I get there, please.
MATT (into phone)
Yeah. (hangs up, to JOSH) She’ll headline. She wants Hinajosa to do the speech. (looking at a report) What is happening in Colorado?
JOSH
Sullivan parachuted in last week, he seemed to have an impact.
MATT
You think?
JOSH (as DONNA joins them)
Donna’s looking for some surrogates to send in.
DONNA
Berryhill’s sick, the AG’s a no.
JOSH
Any takers on the slogan story?
DONNA
Lou struck out on Reuters and the Post.
JOSH
Times?
OTTO (joining them)
CIA briefer’s here.
MATT
So who are sending to Colorado?
JOSH
We need Leo in Michigan and Illinois. Bartlet’s never been very popular out there.
MATT
The Vice President?
DONNA
He plays well in the Rockies.
OTTO
Russell’s stumping Michigan today.
MATT
All right, see if we can get him on the phone. (OTTO heads away) You want to send the briefer back, or should I sit with Goodwin first?
JOSH
Actually, we should get him on the chat.
MATT
The chat?
JOSH
Atrios just flew in.
MATT
Atrios?
DONNA (heading away)
You have a live chat on Eschaton.
MATT
Really? I speak three languages, but …
JOSH
It’s a blog.
MATT (sighs)
We’re gonna bump the CIA and Barry Goodwin for a guy named Atrios?
JOSH
He’s raised 300 grand online. He has almost as many readers as the, Philadelphia Inquirer.
A nerdy-looking man with glasses steps into the back, guided by OTTO. JOSH says ‘sorry’ as he squeezes his way past them.
MATT (shaking hands)
Atrios!
ATRIOS
Sir, it’s an honor.
MATT
Welcome to the campaign.
CUT TO: INT. - MEETING ROOM – DAY
ALANA is looking through the proposed indictments as TOBY paces.
ALANA
There’s more than enough here to convince the grand jury.
TOBY
There’s no way he’s gonna go through with it.
ALANA
Toby, you -
TOBY
This is absolute partisan garbage! Total political bull -
ALANA
It’s got nothing to do with politics, the guy’s a Bartlet appointee.
TOBY
Plenty of moderate Democrats in love with Arnold Vinick.
ALANA
It’s his responsibility to uncover the truth.
TOBY
Be that as it may, he’s bluffing.
ALANA
Maybe.
TOBY
There’s no way he’s gonna throw (TOBY chuckles) a national election?
ALANA sighs, her head back in the chair.
TOBY
What?
ALANA
Look, Toby … if you’re trying to protect your brother, then …. (throwing the indictment down on the table) damn it, Toby, he indicts you tomorrow, you know that a McGarry subpoena is gonna all but guarantee a Vinick landslide on Tuesday.
TOBY
He’s not gonna do it.
ALANA (beat)
Are you really prepared to take that chance?
TOBY considers, then goes back to pacing.
CUT TO: The SANTOS campaign motorcade rolls down a rural highway.
12:30 PM
OUTSIDE QUAKERTOWN, PA
CUT TO: INT. - SANTOS CAMPAIGN BUS – DAY
Overlapping voices, with LOUISE, DONNA, OTTO, and JOSH all on their cell phones, with TV news coverage heard in the background.
LOUISE (into phone)
Yes, I get it.
DONNA (VO, into her phone)
Right.
LOUISE (into phone)
I need the Rasmussen poll. Yes, I need to talk to Edie.
DONNA (VO, into phone)
- thing with the slogan.
BON JOVI walks up the aisle and speaks to LOUISE.
BON JOVI
Is that the latest polling?
LOUISE
Oh. Yeah.
BON JOVI
How’s it looking?
LOUISE
Good, uh – pretty good!
OTTO (holding out his phone)
Lou, I’ve got Edie.
LOUISE
Okay, could you tell her I’ll call her back, please? Thank you.
BON JOVI (looking at the polling)
Cool, Illinois.
LOUISE
Yeah, it is, and you know what else is cool, your new album. Fantastic. And the work you’ve been doing in Philly is so -
JOSH (into phone, overlapping)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I’ll hold.
DONNA (VO, into phone, overlapping)
I’m sorry, could you hold? (switching lines)
LOUISE (overlapping, cont.)
- fantastic, also, as well -
DONNA (into phone, overlapping)
Donna Moss.
OTTO (to JOSH, overlapping)
I’ve got a, Bob on the phone?
JOSH
Yeah, I’ll call him back. (to LOUISE) You said there was a story on Drudge?
LOUISE
Uh-huh?
BON JOVI (holding up his phone)
Excuse me, I have to make a phone call.
LOUISE (as BON JOVI goes to the back)
Sure, no problem.
JOSH (smiling)
Livin’ on a prayer?
LOUISE
Aren’t you supposed to be on the phone?
JOSH
Yeah, I’m holding for the Vice President, what’s on Drudge?
LOUISE
Got the latest Rasmussen poll.
JOSH
That poll is skewed.
LOUISE
It’s got us up by four in Ohio.
JOSH (shouting to the bus)
Ohio trends Santos! That’s the story of the day. (to LOUISE) You wanna call -
LOUISE (already dialing her phone)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
JOSH (cont.)
- okay.
OTTO
I’ve got Annabeth.
JOSH
Tell her I’ll call her back, I’m holding for the Vice President.
OTTO (murmuring into his phone)
You got that? Okay. (hangs up; to LOUISE) Are you still pushing the slogan story?
LOUISE
It’s dead. Why?
OTTO
Vinick’s ‘Yes, America Can’ bus tour?
LOUISE
Uh-huh?
OTTO
The buses were made in Canada.
LOUISE
You’re a very attractive young man.
DONNA (VO, into phone, overlapping)
Donna Moss.
OTTO
You want me to call the, uh -
LOUISE
I got it. (into phone) Hey, Howard, I got two good stories for you -
DONNA (to JOSH)
I’ve got Annabeth.
JOSH
Tell her, uh, I, oh (into phone) yeah, hi there!
DONNA (into phone, overlapping)
Hi, he’s gonna call you back.
JOSH (into phone)
Yeah. (beat) Yeah – he can call back. (hanging up) That’s unbelievable.
DONNA
Russell ditch you again?
JOSH
Only guy in America that I can’t get on the phone.
DONNA
Want me to try?
JOSH (seeing the TV news coverage)
Sullivan’s back in Colorado? (everyone looks up for a moment then back to their phones) Someone pull Sullivan’s new schedule off the web.
OTTO
I’ll get it.
JOSH (answers his phone)
Yeah.
Now we focus some attention on the TV news coverage.
NEWS ANCHOR (on TV)
But perhaps the most surprising development of the day came an hour ago in Miami.
JOSH (into phone)
Yeah, it’s Josh Lyman, I am calling again for the Vice President.
REPORTER 1 (VO, on TV)
Mrs. Santos, do you have any comments on Mayor Hinojosa’s assertions -
JOSH (into phone, overlapping)
I understand he’s a busy man, I’m calling on behalf of Matthew Santos.
REPORTER 1 (VO, on TV, overlapping, cont.)
- about the treatment of Hispanics on the ex-con voting rolls?
HELEN (on TV)
I think it’s a real concern.
REPORTER 2 (VO, on TV)
Mrs. Santos, some Democratic activists have argued that laws against felon voting should be abolished.
Everyone on the bus is now watching HELEN on TV.
LOUISE
Say no. Say no.
HELEN (on TV)
It’s the largest bloc of disenfranchised voters in the country. Yeah, I think it’s something we should take a look at.
JOSH (into phone)
Yeah, I need to call him back.
LOUISE (into phone)
Can I call you back?
OTTO (into phone)
I’ll call you back.
Everyone hangs up their phones.
CUT TO: EXT. - RESIDENTIAL STREET – DAY
We see TOBY sitting behind the wheel of a car, parked outside a suburban house. He picks up his cell phone and speed-dials a number. A WOMAN answers.
WOMAN (VO, on phone)
Hello? (beat) Hello?
TOBY (into phone)
Hi.
We CUT TO inside the house, where ANDY WYATT is finishing up a meeting with a staffer.
ANDY (into phone)
Toby?
TOBY (VO, on phone)
Yeah.
ANDY (into phone)
Are you okay?
TOBY (VO, on phone)
Mm-hmm.
ANDY (into phone)
Are you still coming over tonight?
TOBY (VO, on phone)
Yeah.
ANDY (into phone)
5:00, right?
TOBY (VO, on phone)
Sure.
Back to TOBY in his car.
TOBY (into phone)
You know, I thought – maybe I’d - come over now. Help the kids get into their costumes.
ANDY (VO, on phone)
The kids are at preschool until 2:00.
TOBY (into phone)
Right.
ANDY (VO, on phone)
Toby?
A pause.
TOBY (into phone)
Yeah?
We see ANDY walking to a window and seeing TOBY in his car on the street.
ANDY (into phone)
You’re sitting outside my house.
TOBY (into phone)
Yeah.
TOBY turns to look at the house. ANDY and TOBY regard each other. TOBY rolls down his window and gives a little wave. ANDY waves back.
TOBY (into phone)
Can I come in?
ANDY (VO, on phone, seen through the window)
Uh, Toby, I, I have a lunch – and two campaign events.
TOBY (into phone)
I could tag along.
ANDY responds with a short sigh.
TOBY (into phone)
Though probably not the message you want to send to your constituents, huh?
ANDY (checking her watch; VO, on phone, through window)
Uh, why don’t you come over at 5:00 like we planned? (she waves again)
TOBY (into phone)
Okay.
TOBY watches as ANDY hangs up and walks away from the window. TOBY sits and thinks.
CUT TO: EXT. - CITY STREET – DAY
People are milling about as the Santos campaign bus pulls to a stop. Construction workers watch from across the street.
12:45 PM
RITTENHOUSE SQUARE
PHILADELPHIA
CUT TO: INT. - BACK OF THE SANTOS BUS – DAY
MATT is still having his online ‘chat’ with ATRIOS, speaking while ATRIOS taps away madly on his laptop, transcribing him.
MATT
Vinick’s tax plan has so many exceptions and loopholes – tell ‘em, I wouldn’t be a proponent of any tax plan that couldn’t be figured out on an Excel spreadsheet. (watching him type, tapping on Atrios' laptop) Let’s go, let’s go! I’m happy to type those answers myself.
JOSH arrives to end the chat.
JOSH
I’m gonna have to pull the Congressman.
MATT jumps up and heads to the front of the bus, grabbing his suit jacket.
MATT
Not much of a people person.
JOSH
Almost as many readers as the Philadelphia -
MATT
I got it.
MATT stops to pour a cup of coffee, but the carafe is empty. He notices the TV news.
MATT
Sullivan’s in Colorado again?
LOUISE
The VP should neutralize him.
MATT
Is he gonna do it?
JOSH
Yeah, we’re playing phone tag.
LOUISE
Ohio’s trending Santos.
MATT
Rasmussen poll?
JOSH (with an uneasy smile)
Story of the day.
MATT (putting on his jacket)
Okay. Am I gonna get to do my, uh, CIA briefing on stability ops in Kazakhstan?
JOSH
Yeah.
MATT (seeing the looks on JOSH and LOUISE’s faces)
What?
JOSH
Your wife just made a statement that makes it sound like she’s for felon voting.
LOUISE
In a universal suffrage, ‘Free Capone’ kind of way.
MATT
Ah, that’s not gonna play so well with the law and order moderates in the West.
LOUISE
Not really, no.
MATT
I’m gonna have to take a position on this.
DONNA (on the bus steps)
The Governor’s teeing us up outside and we need to get a quick photo op in with the DNC finance guys.
MATT (to DONNA)
What is the schedule after the rally?
DONNA
Uh, interview with the Inquirer, sit downs with Goodwin, Nancy McNally -
MATT
Plus? (as everyone looks at him) The Kazakhstan briefing.
LOUISE
And the Cincinnati event at 3:00.
MATT
Yeah.
JOSH
We’re already behind.
LOUISE
You wanna bump McNally?
MATT
No! See if Goodwin and McNally can come to Ohio. We’ll talk about the rest of this on the plane, and then talk legal and Cincinnati in Kazakhstan.
MATT steps off the bus as JOSH looks at LOUISE quizzically.
LOUISE (pointing her fingers and rotating them in reverse directions)
He meant that …
JOSH
Yeah, I’m gonna get him some more coffee.
We see MATT stepping off the bus, shaking hands with the DNC finance guys as cameras click away. JOSH follows and watches the scene.
MATT
Hi. Hi, there. Thank you guys for all of your efforts.
MAN
Our pleasure, Mr. President. You know I’ve taken pictures with three other Commander in Chiefs.
MATT (posing with the MAN)
I think that’s Commanders in Chief.
MAN
Oh, uh, how about, uh, ‘leaders of the free world,’ then? (chuckling)
MATT
Cart before the horse, my friend.
MAN
Oh, no. I know how to pick the winners. And you’re definitely gonna win. We’ll be back for a photo in the Oval before you know it.
MATT chuckles weakly.
FADE OUT.
END ACT TWO.
* * *
ACT THREE
FADE IN: INT. - SANTOS CAMPAIGN PLANE – DAY
We begin with a TV monitor on the plane showing MSNBC coverage of MATT walking from his campaign bus towards the plane at Philadelphia International Airport. The camera moves to the plane door as MATT comes aboard, along with DONNA, JOSH, and other staffers. We hear a crowd chanting ‘Santos, Santos’ outside.
MATT
You know, I had a couple more questions for that, uh, CIA briefer about the troops that are stationed at the, uh -
JOSH
Yeah, we lost that guy at the rally.
DONNA
Probably not a field operative. (introducing a guest to MATT) Congresswoman Cone, 8th District. (to CONE) Hi, how are you?
MATT (shaking hands, then posing for a picture)
Congresswoman. Good to see you again.
CONE
Great to see you.
MATT (as cameras flash; to JOSH)
Well, can we make sure that, uh, someone is in Ohio?
JOSH
Yes. Yes, sir, I’ll have Lou put in a call.
MATT (to CONE)
Thank you so much again for your support.
CONE (as she leaves)
My pleasure, Mr. President.
OTTO (with some papers)
You wanted to look over the foreign policy portion of the stump?
MATT (taking the papers)
Ah, yeah.
JOSH
Hey, we hear anything from Russell’s office?
OTTO
No, but I got Leno on the phone.
DONNA
Is it Stu?
OTTO
Stu?
DONNA (reaching for the phone)
He’s one of the writers.
OTTO
It’s not Stu.
The voices overlap as MATT tries to focus on his stump speech.
DONNA (into phone)
Hi, uh, uh, Mr. Leno -
JOSH (into his phone)
Yeah, uh, this is Josh Lyman here, uh – yes, I will hold.
LOUISE
New numbers from Michigan, we’re holding at five up.
DONNA (into phone, overlapping)
Right, I, I just think that the Congressman -
JOSH (overlapping)
Hey, maybe we should pull Leo, send him south.
DONNA (into phone, cont., overlapping)
- doesn’t really wanna wear tights on the -
LOUISE (into phone, overlapping)
Can you conference me into the McGarry advance detail, please.
DONNA (into phone, cont., overlapping)
- uh, that is, um, the campaign doesn’t think that it’s appropriate at this time.
LOUISE (quietly)
Who are you holding for?
JOSH
I’m holding for the Vice President.
MATT (almost to himself)
Ooh, existential in here.
JOSH (into phone, louder)
Hello? Hi. Yeah, we are, we are waiting for him to -
MATT (to OTTO)
I’m gonna have to take a pen to this whole Israel section here before the weekend -
JOSH (into phone, loudly, overlapping)
It’s Josh Lyman -
MATT (rubbing his eyes, overlapping)
- so I want you to set up a conference call with, uh …
JOSH (into phone, cont., overlapping)
You want me to spell that?
MATT (overlapping)
Harold … Waller -
JOSH (into phone, overlapping)
Uh, yes. Yes.
MATT (cont., overlapping)
- for later on tonight.
OTTO
Yes, sir.
JOSH (phone to his ear)
Hey, we getting any traction on that bus story?
OTTO
The Eschaton blog picked it up.
LOUISE
Oooh, your new pal Atrios is giving us the love.
MATT
What’s the bus story?
JOSH
Vinick did the ‘Yes, America Can’ tour on Canadian buses.
MATT (beat)
Anybody check where our buses are made?
LOUISE (phone to her ear, running after OTTO)
Otto …
MATT and JOSH step into the office of the plane, where GOODWIN and TEDDY are waiting for him. The TV on the wall is showing coverage of VINICK speaking to reporters. MATT shakes hands with GOODWIN and TEDDY.
VINICK (on TV)
I don’t know why people who break the laws should have a say in making them.
JOSH
Surprise, surprise …
TEDDY
It’s not all wine and roses for him, either. He’s losing any footing he might have gained in the Black community.
MATT (sitting)
While locking up his base.
DONNA (at the door)
Congressman – we need you out here to take another photo with the Senator.
MATT
I took a photo with him out on the tarmac.
DONNA
Congresswoman got one on the plane.
GOODWIN (as MATT stands, exasperated)
You want to make sure the press gets off of this before the weekend, you should make a statement in Ohio.
MATT
These are Jim Crow laws that should have been thrown out with the poll tax. I am not for giving the vote to every ax murderer who gets out of prison, but for the ones who are nonviolent -
JOSH
I’ll have Otto work on some language.
MATT heads back out of the office.
TEDDY
Twenty-nine states deny ex-cons the right to vote. We’re gonna take a little hit.
GOODWIN
Well, I’d be most concerned about the moderate Dems in Texas and the West.
JOSH
We’re gonna be in Texas every day until the election. But Arizona, Colorado -
GOODWIN
Yeah … You try calling the Vice President?
JOSH, exasperated, looks at GOODWIN, the phone still held to his ear.
CUT TO: INT. - ANDY’S HOUSE – NIGHT
There is a knock at the door. ANDY, dressed as a witch and carrying a bucket of candy, goes to open it. It is TOBY.
ANDY
Hey.
TOBY
Hey.
ANDY
No costume?
TOBY
Well, I thought about coming as Julius Rosenberg.
TOBY and ANDY’s young daughter MOLLY, dressed as a Baltimore Oriole baseball player, comes running up to TOBY.
MOLLY
Hi, Daddy!
TOBY (picking her up)
Hi, Molly!
MOLLY
I’m a baseball player.
TOBY
I can see that. She’s an Oriole. (looking at ANDY)
ANDY
Yeah.
TOBY
What happened to all that Yankees stuff I bought?
ANDY
She likes the little bird.
Now MOLLY’s twin brother HUCK runs down the stairs to TOBY. He is dressed identically to his sister.
HUCK
Hi, Daddy!
TOBY
Hi, Huck! Come here! (He picks up HUCK, and now has a child on each arm) Well! Look at you.
ANDY
He likes what she likes.
TOBY (happily)
You guys going trick-or-treating? Are we going trick-or-treating?
ANDY
So, do you want to take them first?
TOBY takes a beat, then lets HUCK down to the floor.
TOBY
No, you go ahead.
ANDY
Sorry, but if there’s, press -
TOBY (setting MOLLY down to the floor)
Yeah.
ANDY (leading the twins to the door)
Okay, what are we gonna say? Trick or treat! (going out the door; TOBY stands, not looking at them, watching a TV in the next room) Come on. Stay close to Mommy, okay? Huck?
They are gone. TOBY listens to MATT on the TV.
MATT (on TV; the MSNBC chyron reads SANTOS COMMENTS ON FELON VOTING)
While I know this is primarily a matter of state law, I think it’s both imprudent and unreasonable for us to deny a political voice to people who have made an effort to rehabilitate themselves.
CUT TO: EXT. - AIRPORT HANGAR – NIGHT
5:15 PM
DAYTON AIRPORT
MATT is talking with reporters, the exact same event TOBY had been watching live on TV.
REPORTER 1
So you agree with your wife?
MATT
Well, I like to when I can. (the reporters laugh)
REPORTER 2
Congressman Santos, would you let all criminals vote?
MATT
No – but once nonviolent offenders have done their time, I think we should do everything we can to help facilitate a full and healthy return to society.
DONNA
Okay, we need to wrap it up.
REPORTER 3
Who do you like in the game this weekend?
MATT
Uh, Philly and New York, both strong teams, should be a great game.
DONNA (whispering)
We’re in Ohio.
MATT (over his shoulder as he walks away)
Go, Buckeyes! (reporters laugh)
CUT TO: INT. - SANTOS CAMPAIGN BUS – NIGHT
We see a closeup of someone playing a gentle melody on a guitar. The face of MATT and HELEN’s daughter, MIRANDA, is seen reflected in the surface of a guitar. The hand strumming the strings stops.
MIRANDA (dressed as a princess)
Play it again, play it again!
Now we see it is BON JOVI playing the guitar. MIRANDA’s brother PETER, dressed as Harry Potter, is sitting behind them watching, eating a bowl of ice cream.
BON JOVI
All right. (he starts playing again)
MATT and DONNA enter the bus.
MATT
We gonna need to do follow up?
DONNA
Ten minutes with the Times and the Post.
MATT
And Leo’s on the same page?
DONNA
He’s giving a statement in Minneapolis.
MATT (going to MIRANDA)
Ah, the Fairy Queen is on my bus! (he picks her up)
MIRANDA
Hi, Daddy.
MATT (giving her a kiss)
Hi. That’s a beautiful dress.
MIRANDA
It’s itchy.
MATT
Yeah?
PETER
Hi, Dad.
MATT (moving the bowl away from PETER)
Ice cream before dinner?
DONNA
Graeter’s, it’s a Cincinnati delicacy. Made for a great photo op.
MATT
Where’s their grandmother?
DONNA
I saw her chatting with Ben Affleck.
LOUISE (stepping onto the bus)
There’s candy on the press van if you want to get a head start on trick-or-treating.
PETER (as he and MIRANDA scramble to leave)
I do! I do!
MATT
Whoa …
BON JOVI (standing)
You know what – I’ll keep an eye on them for you.
MATT
Thanks, Jon.
LOUISE (as BON JOVI steps out of the bus)
He’s fantastic.
MATT
An international rock star looking after my kids. Yeah, it’s like a dream come true.
LOUISE
Oh, you want me to, uh – (motions her head to the door)
MATT throws up his hands as LOUISE exits to follow BON JOVI and the kids.
MATT (to DONNA and JOSH in the back)
I got, McNally on Kazakhstan?
JOSH
Goodwin on the legal contingencies.
MATT
And then, McNally?
DONNA
Probably the Times.
OTTO (as MATT realizes he’s put his hand in spilled ice cream)
I’ve got Leo on the phone.
JOSH
Yeah, uhhh, we were hoping to discuss, uh, sending him down south.
OTTO
And WKRC’s been holding for half an hour.
JOSH
Mm-hmm. We’ll try to squeeze McNally in after the trick-or-treating.
MATT (nods)
Let’s, uh – push the Waller call. And, uh, can somebody find Helen’s mother and ask her to, you know, I don’t know - keep an eye on the kids?
JOSH and DONNA share a look as MATT heads to the back of the bus.
CUT TO: INT. - ANDY’S HOUSE – NIGHT
TOBY is seen with HUCK sleeping on the sofa. TOBY takes HUCK’s candy bag as ANDY appears down the hall, still in her witch costume, but without the hat. She has a glass of wine. TOBY walks to join ANDY.
ANDY
How’d we do?
TOBY (digging in the bag)
A couple of Mars bars. (holding a piece of candy out to ANDY) Bit-O-Honey?
ANDY (taking the candy)
That’ll do.
TOBY
So, the witch thing works.
ANDY (smiling)
Yeah?
TOBY
Uh-huh. I mean, not as well as the Catholic schoolgirl thing, but yeah.
ANDY holds up the wine bottle to TOBY. He shakes his head. ANDY pours some more in her glass.
TOBY
I had a meeting today. (beat) US Attorney’s office is threatening another indictment, tomorrow. Obstruction of justice. Which may very well screw every Democrat in the country running for office … not to mention the Santos campaign.
ANDY looks away, sets her glass down, and slowly walks to TOBY.
ANDY
What the hell’s the matter with you? Just tell them it was your brother.
TOBY (chuckling)
Okay.
ANDY
Look, David’s dead, and even if he were alive, he’d tell you -
TOBY
What if it wasn’t David?
ANDY (sighing heavily)
Only you.
TOBY
What?
ANDY
A Republican hasn’t won the Maryland 8th in 40 years … I’m running neck and neck … my campaign manager wants to make ‘That’s why I divorced him’ buttons. Just tell the US Attorney it was David and this will all be over. (beat) It’s what he would have wanted you to do -
TOBY
Don’t tell me what my brother would have wanted. (beat) He did nothing wrong, and I will not consider for one second defaming his reputation over something he had absolutely nothing to do with.
ANDY gives TOBY a long, steady look.
ANDY
Is that what you’re gonna tell the kids?
They look at each other in silence, then ANDY turns and walks away.
CUT TO: INT. - AIRPLANE HANGAR – NIGHT
JOSH walks in front of the Santos campaign bus, chewing gum and checking his watch as he awaits MATT to return from some event. BON JOVI, standing by a refreshment table outside the bus, calls out to him.
BON JOVI
Hey, Josh …
JOSH
Yeah?
BON JOVI
When you get a sec, I’d like to pitch you some ideas on service. You know, volunteerism on the national level. We’ve been really workin’ hard to try to make it hip again.
OTTO (joining them, smiling at BON JOVI)
Volunteerism is the new black.
BON JOVI
Right, actually, that’s our slogan.
OTTO
Yeah, I saw it on Oprah.
BON JOVI
Great, you see, I’d really like to come down to DC, maybe during the transition.
JOSH
We’ll set somethin’ up.
BON JOVI
Thanks.
OTTO
Sure, Jon.
BON JOVI (walking away)
Yeah.
OTTO watches BON JOVI walk away, a goofy grin on his face.
JOSH (to OTTO)
Was there something … ?
OTTO (handing JOSH some paperwork)
Um, Oregon early voting returns, and I pushed the Waller call to 9:00.
JOSH (paging through the papers)
What’s the Waller call?
OTTO
He wants to revisit the foreign policy stuff in the stump, he wants Hal Waller to weigh in on the Israel section.
JOSH (surprised)
Yeah, that’s not gonna happen.
OTTO
The Congressman was pretty adamant.
JOSH (handing the papers back to OTTO)
Cancel it. (as OTTO leaves) You got it? (to DONNA as she walks up) We’re late.
DONNA
Annabeth said they’d be here any minute.
JOSH
Yeah.
DONNA
The Congressman seems a little irritated.
JOSH (sighs)
He’s sleep deprived, like the rest of us.
DONNA (beat)
Sure.
JOSH (leading DONNA away as they head for the arriving motorcade)
Bartlet put his fist through a couple of walls last week of the first campaign. Where are we on Leno?
DONNA
Oh, they’ve got this whole Robin Hood Halloween skit they wanna do.
JOSH
Robin Hood?
DONNA (referring to her notepad)
Santos starts talking about closing off tax loopholes for the rich, Leno asks what he was for Halloween – they cut to a prerecorded bit of the Congressman trick or treating in a Robin Hood costume. (as JOSH opens the door of an SUV) I was thinking maybe without the tights?
HELEN (exiting the SUV, ANNABETH right behind)
Tights? My husband in tights?
DONNA
Mrs. Santos.
ANNABETH
Might lock up the women’s vote.
HELEN
You’ve never seen his legs.
JOSH (gesturing back to the bus)
We’re late, if we could -
HELEN
Yeah. Where are my kids?
DONNA
They’re in the press van, they’re getting a head start on trick-or-treating.
HELEN (veering away toward the press van)
Oh, that’s great.
DONNA and ANNABETH
Mrs. Santos -
HELEN stops, looks back, then returns.
HELEN
Probably not the best place for me right now, huh? Well, if someone else wouldn’t mind checking to make sure my kids are not falling into a diabetic coma -
ANNABETH
I’m on it.
HELEN (heading for the bus)
Great.
JOSH (under his breath, bouncing in frustration)
Oh, sweet Lord in heaven …
DONNA
Yeah, a-, about the, um, Robin Hood sketch?
JOSH
He’s already showing the felons the love, we don’t need him to dress up like one.
DONNA
So how should I handle Leno?
JOSH
Come up with something funnier.
CUT TO: INT. - HUCK AND MOLLY’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
TOBY is carrying MOLLY to bed. HUCK is already asleep in his. TOBY puts MOLLY down, pulls up the covers, and gives her a kiss. He turns to HUCK’s bed, picks up a Yankees cap and puts it over the Orioles cap on the bedpost.
TOBY
Trust me, you’ll be happier.
TOBY bends down and gives HUCK a kiss good night. ANDY whispers from the doorway.
ANDY (VO, whispering)
Toby -
TOBY (whispering)
Yeah.
TOBY keeps watching HUCK sleep as we
FADE OUT.
END ACT THREE.
* * *
ACT FOUR
FADE IN: The Santos bus and campaign motorcade are rolling down a rural highway at night.
7:00 PM
OUTSIDE DAYTON, OHIO
CUT TO: INT. - CAMPAIGN BUS – NIGHT
MATT is talking on a cell phone.
MATT (into phone)
One out of every eight African-American men unable to vote is clearly an issue. (pause) Thanks. (beat) Oh, absolutely. (beat) Excuse me? (beat) No, we’ve had a lot of people out for the rallies, I think we’re doing all right. (hangs up; to GOODWIN, who is sitting across the desk from MATT) Six hundred lawyers in Florida.
GOODWIN
Hmm. Leo wanted to double it.
MATT (with dark circles under his eyes, obviously tired)
Twelve hundred lawyers, there’s gotta be a joke there somewhere.
GOODWIN
Some of this is routine. Machines don’t work, folks are turned away – we’ll want lawyers in place to keep the polls open.
MATT
That’s why we’ve got the legal briefs.
GOODWIN
No, we drafted those in case we need to contest the battlegrounds.
MATT (sighs)
Right.
GOODWIN
Look, we’d rather things go smoothly on election day, which is why we’ve mobilized 10,000 lawyers. But the polls in Pennsylvania and Ohio, they’re really pretty close. We need to be prepared for a court battle.
MATT is about to answer when OTTO speaks at the door.
OTTO
Congressman, we’re pulling into Dayton.
MATT (standing, putting on a jacket)
Dayton. Thanks. (beat) You ever get nostalgic for the good old days, Barry? When there was just a winner and a loser?
GOODWIN (chuckling)
Talk to my Republican friends in Chicago – the good old days weren’t, really.
The campaign bus pulls to a stop. Reporters and state troopers mill about. We then CUT TO the front of the bus, where ANNABETH and DONNA are brainstorming.
ANNABETH
How about a Top Ten list?
DONNA
That’s Letterman.
ANNABETH
He’s funny.
DONNA
Yeah.
BON JOVI (who overhears this)
What are you guys doing?
DONNA
We’re trying to come up with a bit for the Congressman to do on Leno, preferably something that doesn’t involve a costume.
BON JOVI
Does he play an instrument?
ANNABETH
Hey, that’s not a bad idea. He could have a jam with the band.
DONNA (as MATT appears from the back of the bus)
Hey, Congressman, do you play a musical instrument?
MATT (walking past to exit)
Clarinet.
BON JOVI (disappointedly)
Yeah. That’s not gonna work.
CUT TO: EXT. - DAYTON NEIGHBORHOOD – NIGHT
MATT, smiling, steps off the bus. JOSH is there to meet him.
JOSH (cell phone to his ear)
Don’t get into it with the kids in the Vinick masks.
MATT
Thanks for the tip.
JOSH (into phone)
Yeah, uh, I’ve been holding for the Vice President for half an hour. Can you please -
MATT (taking the phone)
Give me that.
JOSH
Sir, you need to -
MATT
It’s okay. (into phone) Hi. Yeah, this is Matthew Santos. Could you poss – (pause. MATT chuckles, then turns towards the lights of the press cameras) Turn on CNN. I’ll wave. (beat) Yeah. Oh, oh, I appreciate your support. Now - you think you can possibly find the Vice President? (beat) Mm-hmm. (beat) Thank you. Oh, no, I, I’m gonna wait.
MATT steps back onto the bus.
CUT TO: INT. - MEETING ROOM – NIGHT
ALANA and TOBY are waiting as BLAKE comes in the door.
BLAKE (sighing)
Happy Halloween.
ALANA
Sorry to drag you away from your kids.
BLAKE
Well, as long as you’re willing to explain it to my wife.
ALANA sits as BLAKE starts to eat from a bag of candy.
BLAKE (to TOBY)
You did drag me down here for a reason.
TOBY
You’re a pretty ambitious guy, huh? What are you, 38, 39? Peter Blake, US Attorney for the District of Columbia, what’s next? Congress? The Senate? A seat on the federal bench? What happens when you sit down with the DNC Chair in two years?
BLAKE
You gotta be kidding me.
TOBY
A congressional race in Virginia you want to throw your hat in, I’m just wondering what Mr. Chairman’s gonna be thinking about.
BLAKE
You came here to lecture me.
TOBY
Your Rhodes scholarship? Your performance on Law Review?
BLAKE
I’m going to the grand jury in the morning.
TOBY
No, you’re not. You’re not gonna do this.
ALANA
Toby -
TOBY
It’s wrong, and it’s irresponsible.
BLAKE
Irresponsible, how about Chief of Staff of the United States sharing classified Defense Department information with an unauthorized -
TOBY
That’s not what happened.
BLAKE
I have a deposition from Oliver Babish that says exactly that.
TOBY
She asked me a hypothetical question -
BLAKE
You discussed the existence of a secret military shuttle with CJ Cregg, you didn’t have clearance, and she did. Now, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what happened. Please tell me I didn’t leave a crying six-year-old in a Dorothy costume for this.
There is silence as both ALANA and BLAKE look at TOBY.
CUT TO: EXT. - DAYTON NEIGHBORHOOD – NIGHT
JOSH is on a walkie-talkie outside the campaign bus. LOUISE is behind him on her cell phone.
JOSH (into walkie-talkie)
Just keep ‘em trick-or-treating -
LOUISE (into phone)
We need to hold the Houston crowd -
JOSH (into walkie-talkie)
Half-hour, tops.
LOUISE (overlapping, into phone, cont.)
- about an hour, hour and a half -
JOSH (overlapping, into walkie-talkie)
Yes, both kids.
LOUISE (overlapping, into phone, cont.)
- ‘cause he was mayor of the city, we need, need more than five guys and a homemade banner.
JOSH (to LOUISE)
You know, advance promised us 30,000 people.
LOUISE (to JOSH)
Sure. (pointing to the bus as MATT exits) Tick-tock.
JOSH and LOUISE (into their respective devices)
I’ll call you back.
LOUISE
Thank you.
MATT strides away, JOSH, LOUISE and the rest following along.
MATT
Five days out, and I’m – (tossing the phone back to JOSH) – wasting time with Bob Russell.
JOSH
Is he on board?
MATT
Gives me some song-and-dance about all the other candidates he’s stumping for. (scoffs)
LOUISE
He said no?
MATT
No, he didn’t say no; he can’t say no. So we’re gonna need surrogates to take his place in Ohio. (rubbing his face) Say, am I gonna get any time with McNally before this day is over?
JOSH
Soon as we get back on the bus.
MATT
Oh, yeah? And then what? I get the 15 minutes between here and the airport to figure out - the impact of Kazakhstan on our long-term foreign policy.
JOSH (into his phone)
Yeah, you get me Edie, please?
LOUISE
More or less. Try to make it look like you’re enjoying your time with the children.
MATT joins HELEN and the kids, standing on the street outside a house. Photographers and cameramen are everywhere.
MATT
Hey!
HELEN (smiling, yet perturbed)
Sweetheart –
MATT (kissing HELEN on the cheek)
Sorry I’m late. (to the kids) How are the spoils? (looking in PETER’s bucket) Whoa, that’s a lot of candy there.
PETER (obviously not feeling well)
My stomach hurts.
MATT
Oh, okay, why don’t you let me carry that -
MIRANDA
Can we go now?
MATT (giving MIRANDA a kiss)
Uh, just one more house, honey, okay? Come on. (leading the family down the walk) Here we go. (holding up PETER’s candy) What’d you guys do, raid the candy store?
HELEN
Well, between the press and the 63 houses we’ve just been at -
MATT
Yeah, I’m sorry.
HELEN
Who thought ice cream was a good idea?
MATT
Well, you know, it’s been a bit of a day. (as they turn their way into a yard) Right here?
HELEN
Made a factual statement, it’s not like I was banging on a drum.
MATT
Helen – come on. It wasn’t your fault. Annabeth shouldn’t have left you out there on your own.
HELEN (chuckles sarcastically)
Now that we got that cleared up -
MATT (ringing the doorbell)
I said it wasn’t your fault -
HELEN
If you were so concerned about me opening my big mouth then maybe you shouldn’t have sent me to the damn event in the first place.
The door opens and a WOMAN stands there, holding a plate full of caramel apples.
WOMAN
Well, what do we have here?
PETER sees the caramel apples right in his face, and immediately vomits off to the side of the door.
WOMAN
Oh, my …
HELEN (chuckling sardonically, looking back at the press cameras)
This is perfect.
CUT TO: INT. - MEETING ROOM – NIGHT
The meeting with BLAKE, ALANA, and TOBY continues.
BLAKE
CJ’s got a problem, the President’s not doing what she wants him to do, she does what she’s done a thousand times before, she talks to you. Maybe she thinks you have clearance, maybe she knows you don’t, maybe she has no idea that you’re gonna leak it, but you do, and she’s screwed, and it’s your fault, so you fall on the grenade.
TOBY
It wasn’t CJ.
BLAKE
Okay, what about Leo?
TOBY
It wasn’t Leo.
BLAKE (frustrated)
Toby … there was someone else. You weren’t authorized to have that information.
There’s a long pause.
BLAKE
All right. I assume we’re done here.
TOBY
‘A citizen’s safety lies in the prosecutor who approaches his task with humility.’ Justice Robert Jackson. ‘Your position is of such independence and importance that while being diligent, strict, and vigorous in law enforcement, you can also afford to be just’!
BLAKE
It’s my responsibility to find out who helped you! That’s my job!
TOBY
You can indict me. You can threaten to put me in federal prison for six years. You can subpoena the President, subpoena Leo McGarry, subpoena CJ Cregg – you can undermine a presidential election, and it won’t change anything! I’m still not gonna change my story!
BLAKE
And that’s it?
TOBY
Yeah. That’s it. (beat) I’ve dedicated my life to this country, to public service. And regardless of our different interpretations of the role of the federal prosecutor in our legal system, I don’t think derailing a presidential election is part of your job description!
TOBY and BLAKE stare at each other.
TOBY
And I don’t think you believe it is either.
CUT TO: INT. - SANTOS CAMPAIGN PLANE – NIGHT
DONNA, OTTO, and ANNABETH are in the galley, still brainstorming.
DONNA
Okay – (clears throat) Leno puts on a Vinick mask, steals a bag of Halloween candy – then the Congressman comes in wearing a police uniform and arrests him. (blank looks from ANNABETH and OTTO) Not funny at all, huh?
ANNABETH
Maybe we should go back to the clarinet.
JOSH and LOUISE enter the plane, heading for the front.
JOSH (checking his watch)
Ah, damn it, we’re not gonna make it to Houston till 10:00.
LOUISE
You wanna cancel the rally?
JOSH
Think we can get another shot at the trick-or-treating photo op?
LOUISE shakes her head as DONNA joins them.
DONNA
We’re nowhere on Leno.
JOSH
Annabeth have any ideas?
DONNA
Annabeth likes the tights.
JOSH
Yeah.
MATT and his family walk on board the plane. MATT is carrying PETER, rubbing his back.
MATT
Yeah, I know. It’s okay, buddy. We’ll be home in just a few hours.
HELEN comes up behind MATT, reaching for PETER.
MATT
No, I got him, honey.
HELEN helps PETER down and guides both children to their seats.
HELEN
Come on, come sit.
MATT (to steward)
Can I maybe get some coffee? (as OTTO hands him some papers) Uh, where’s McNally?
OTTO
Sir?
MATT
Nancy McNally, NSA – we were just starting to get into the whole ramifications of, uh, long-term troop deployment in Kazakhstan.
OTTO
Right. She had an early meeting in DC -
MATT
She left?
OTTO nods, and MATT strides forward into the cabin with JOSH, DONNA, and LOUISE.
MATT
Nancy McNally left.
JOSH
Uh, yes, sir, she had a last-minute meeting -
MATT
Yeah, can we get her on the phone?
JOSH
Sure. Sir, there’s an issue with The Tonight Show.
MATT
The Tonight Show.
DONNA
Leno’s got this idea for a sketch; it involves a Robin Hood costume. We’re not that wild about the costume or -
MATT (irritated)
I need, I need to get McNally on the phone. I’ve got a conference call with, uh, Hal Waller at 9:00. You, you really think this is the best use of my time?
JOSH
It’s all right, I, I canceled the Waller call.
MATT
Excuse me?
JOSH
The Waller call. I – canceled it. We’ve already pushed through the foreign policy section of the stump, a half-hour conference call on the Mideast -
MATT (getting upset)
We’re gonna wind up with 150,000 men in Kazakhstan, we’re gonna have to pull at least 10,000 soldiers out of Israel -
HELEN appears behind JOSH.
MATT (cont.)
- that is gonna change our entire Mideast peacekeeping timetable.
JOSH
Which is why Otto and the speechwriting team are working on -
MATT (shouting)
We’re looking at three to four years in Central Asia! That is an entire presidency! Otto and the speechwriting team have barely scratched the surface.
MATT storms into his office, slamming the door. JOSH looks on stolidly, his eyes welling up a little.
HELEN
You want me to, uh …
JOSH
No. (pause) No, I got it.
JOSH heads into the office. MATT is looking out the window as he enters.
MATT
We need to start addressing the real issues. Stop wasting time on beauty pageant ephemera.
JOSH (closing the door)
Congressman, you know as well as I do that right now, what you say on Leno, and how your family looks trick-or-treating are a hell of a lot more important -
MATT
Damn it, Josh, we need to focus -
JOSH
We are. You like Goodwin and McNally?
MATT (scoffs)
Oh, well, it’s not like I had a whole hell of a lot of time with McNally.
JOSH
Berryhill had five minutes eight years ago, you like her?
MATT
Yeah. I do.
JOSH
Goodwin? (MATT nods) Great. We got an Attorney General and a Secretary of State. That’s not bad for a three-state, six-market day. Now, we’re gonna have this conversation about Leno – then you’re gonna talk to Nancy, then you’re gonna make up with your wife, so we have a relatively happy couple for the rally in Houston.
MATT continues to look away, frustrated.
JOSH
Congressman?
MATT turns to look at JOSH. His eyes are red and sunken, he’s clearly exhausted.
MATT
Yeah.
JOSH smiles and nods.
JOSH
Good.
MATT (as JOSH turns to go)
Josh …
JOSH
Yeah?
MATT
You think we’re gonna win?
JOSH looks steadily at MATT. A glimmer of a smile plays across his face.
JOSH
I do.
JOSH takes a moment, then steps out of the office. MATT takes a breath and raises his eyebrows as he considers.
DISSOLVE TO: END TITLES.
FADE TO BLACK.
THE END.
* * *
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The West Wing Transcript
Episode 7x15 – Welcome To Wherever You Are
Original Airdate: March 26, 2006
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